Why I Do the Dew

Dr. Pepper is a dangerous drink. It has a history of exploding or fizzing over when first opened. As a child, Dr. Pepper was a favorite beverage at our house. I still remember the adventure it was to open a 2-liter of Dr. Pepper. It would start as a slow fizz when Dad would first unscrew the cap, but then it would gain momentum and we had the stains on the kitchen ceiling to prove it. Perhaps it's the childhood memories associated with this beverage, perhaps it's the numerous attractions I now find in a can of Mountain Dew, but, for whatever reason, I do not drink a lot of Dr. Pepper now. However, I have an open mind about these things and I was willing to give Dr. Pepper another shot (not literally speaking, of course, because then that would mean failure on the part of Dr. Pepper to redeem it's reputation). However, I have learned the hard way that there are some things about which it is best to keep closed-minded.

Last night, Walmart had 2-liters of Dr. Pepper on sale for $1.00. My sisters and I were going to hang out at my brother's house and he asked if we could bring some pop. We decided the $1.00 2-liters would be a good deal, so being in a generously open-minded mood, I agreed that we could buy not only one, but TWO 2-liters of Dr. Pepper. Cherry Dr. Pepper and the original flavor. After getting over to my brother's house and playing a little Rock Band II, I was in need of some refreshment. Cherry Dr. Pepper was calling my name. Aghhhh. Just what the Dr. ordered.

I went into the kitchen and as I reached for the unopened 2-liter, a passing thought went through my head. I wonder if Dr. Pepper ever still explodes like it did when I was a kid. Probably not. I'm sure they've improved it over the last 15 years. I began to unscrew the cap, heard the hissing noise and watched helplessly as the fizzy bubbles began rising to the top of the bottle. Suddenly, a 2-liter bottle of Cherry Dr. Pepper was transformed into a spraying fountain of sticky, delicious, sweet, reddish-colored syrup. Remember the old Super Soaker waterguns? Who needs them? A Super Soaker doesn't hold a candle to an ordinary 2-liter of Dr. Pepper. Heck, you don't even have to be a good shot with a 2-liter, because it sprays in a 360-degree radius. The liquid was shooting out from every side of the bottle missing nothing: countertops, cabinets, the wall, the floor, me AND my white sweater. The white sweater part was really the straw that broke the camel's back for me as far as Dr. Pepper is concerned. I am now a very closed-minded pop connoisseur. Mountain Dew=good. Dr. Pepper=bad. There it is in black & white (mostly in the white threads of my sweater). But anyway, what's done is done and I'll try to "give thanks in all things". So thank you, Dr. Pepper. Thanks for the memories.

And thank you, Shout, for an amazing product that has restored my sweet little white sweater to a presentable state.